Popups / Ads - Sneaky Banners
You've seen them. I know you have. They're banners that try to pass
themselves off as something else--the reasoning goes, "everybody is pretty
pissed off about having all these ad banners all over the place, and due to the
number of DMS out there fighting for eyeballs in any dirty way they can, few if
any banners actually lead to a worthwhile product (or even the product
advertised, for that matter), so nobody's going to click on the ad if they know
it's an ad. So we'll try to disguise the ad so it doesn't look like an ad, and
people will click on it because they don't know it's an ad!"
GUI Mimics
The most common (I'm sure you have
seen a couple) are banners that try to disguise themselves as Windows GUI
elements. (Mac users, take heart: The DMS can auto-detect what OS you're using,
and serve you a banner that mimics the Mac GUI, etc.) They look a little
something like this:
These of course come in all shapes and
sizes; often you will see what looks like an open document window with some
enticing text scrolled half-way offscreen. It includes of course a (phony)
scrollbar and arrows to scroll this 'document window' and see what the text
says. You will eventually find out it wasn't a program window at all; it was a
banner and you've been duped! (At about the time when www.slimymarketer.com's
Buy My Products page pops up in your face complete with flashing banners
guaranteed to give you a migraine headache (or a seizure!) )...
Probably the worst type of GUI mimic
banner is the one that's disguised as a search box. It may even have a blinking
cursor in it, inviting you to type a search query. But no sooner do you click in
the search box to activate it, *whisk!* You're at some slimy marketer's
products page! You probably didn't expect to end up there, and probably didn't
want to. But once they get you in the door, hey, they can try and sell you
whatever they want.
Fake Text
Here's another sneaky little tactic to watch out for. Some banners try to
disguise themselves as page text, and even (you may see this on porn sites,
which are pretty much all run by Dirty Marketing SOBs) the entrance to the page.
The idea here is similar to that of 'GUI Mimics'
above. Wary 'netizens don't like clicking on banners for a number of reasons,
including that there are too many ads out here already and they don't want to
encourage them, and the fact that the webmaster displaying the ad gets extra
money (called a referral fee) if you click on the banner. Maybe you don't like
the webmaster's attempts to profit off of you (those 50 or so banners and
promotions on their page have probably made him several dollars just from your
visit alone) and don't feel like making this asshole more cash at your
expense. Sooo.... you won't click on a banner, but you might click on a text
link, especially if it looks like part of the page. In the latter case it looks
like the author of the page has personally selected and endorsed this
link...you're much more likely to visit a site if the webmaster tells you it's a
site worth visiting than if some marketer is being paid to say so (see the
section on advertorials below).
Gosh-darned flashing annoyer banners
They flash really loudly to get your attention no matter where
your eyes are on the page.
These banners exploit the primitive
underwiring of the human brain to make you drop whatever you're doing and look
at their ad. Back in prehistoric times, Homo Sapiens relied on his peripheral
vision to spot lions and tigers, etc. that were a clear and imminent threat to
his continued enjoyment of his lifestyle. Ancient man would see something move
out of the corner of his eye and it was very important that he find out what it
was--fast--so as not to end up a tasty meal for a grizzly bear. Now the
threat of sabre-toothed tigers is largely behind us, but the old survival code
remains. I bet you've looked at that banner up there no less than three times
while reading all that lions and tigers crap. Yep. Have you noticed your having
to steel yourself from looking when that thing flashes? It takes effort, doesn't
it.
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